Phone Box
Guest Post By Giles the whip thin and genitally challenged.
The highlight of the town here in North Oremsby is the fucking telephone box.
Thats it.
The sex starved pathetic moron who writes Mutleythedog said in a leering and lascivious way "lets get a nice titty photo on your guest post" - as though I would be interested in such things. He only looks up tits on the internet for this blog as he imagines his every move is being monitored by the internet police and his future publishers - MacmillanHarper or Penguin - and so he has to have some kind of spurious 'research' excuse. He genuinely believes that someone is interested in him. Its very sad. Who would be interested in such a uniformly pathetic twat as him? Answer?
Both you readers I guess, which makes you double pathetic twats...
North Oremsby makes Dundee look nice. It is like camping inside a power station- with an imbecile and his imaginary friends,,,,
48 comments:
Double twat? that makes me twice as good as the single twat I was called yesterday.
Things are looking up!
I guess I am the other one then.
So where's the titty photo? Don't tease your readers unless you can produce the goods.
Is that a BT 24567/09 model box. Circa 2002?
A rare rare treat. This was recalled almost immediately with only 200 being installed before BT realised there was no telephone installed.
The model 24568/01 was a marked improvement. There was a special perspex covered space above the coin unit which could hold three times as many prostitutes cards as earlier models.
A cylindrical drum with a small hole in the top was put in for male urinaters. A design flaw meant that it could never be emptied. The urine stayed in the drum but it did ensure every phone box had the same authentic odour. However equality law meant that a female accessible squat box would be required, which was impracticable due to size, so this was the last model to possess this feature. The best example of this phone box is coincidentally the main tourist attraction of Dundee.
For more info go to
www.pointlessly-dull_nerdfacts.com
Just saying hello. I know nothing of phone boxes or Dundee so can't add any more than that.
Is the phonebox listed?
Sx
Mutley would make a great MP, as would yourself Sir Giles!
Surely the 'fucking telephone box' is a tourist attraction?
I'm uncertain what number twat I am.
A telephone box. I thought they had all disappeared since 110% of the population has mobiles. Perhaps they'll become museum pieces, if any can be found undamaged by the locals.
Did you find Mr. Mutley's calling card inside?
I'm new here. Being called a double twat is quite the welcome! I guess that makes me a triple twat for still reading and wanting to follow. A triple twatted sheep. Nice.
there is town very close to where i live named Flatville...yes it is flat as the eye can see...the big attraction there is the grain elevator...things could be worse my darling...:)
Daisy.
What sort of elevator is it?
Cast iron or aluminium sheets.
Could you get a picture?
I'm feeling all flushed at the excitement.
The people divide themselves in two categories, those that await the telephone and those that await the tonality.
The day where the damned stupidity will sell itself in tubes, there are some that will be the first ones to offer itself a brush to teeth.
heck i don't know bill...that seems to be all they have around here...i see them all the time but never really look at them...i will get a picture when i am out and post it just for you darling ;)
Well everyone else loves and appreciates me ;-)
Blogger Hammer said...
Double twat? that makes me twice as good as the single twat I was called yesterday.
Things are looking up! I want to apologise for Giles rudeness, he is in a lot of pain....
Blogger xl said...
I guess I am the other one then. I do not think he has any idea how offensive he is... he called me pathetic...
Blogger Gorilla Bananas said...
So where's the titty photo? Don't tease your readers unless you can produce the goods. Wise council indeed Mr Bananas, I am chagrined...
So where's the titty photo? Don't tease your readers unless you can produce the goods.
11:18 PM
Delete
Blogger Bill Quango MP said...
Is that a BT 24567/09 model box. Circa 2002?
A rare rare treat. This was recalled almost immediately with only 200 being installed before BT realised there was no telephone installed.
The model 24568/01 was a marked improvement. There was a special perspex covered space above the coin unit which could hold three times as many prostitutes cards as earlier models.
A cylindrical drum with a small hole in the top was put in for male urinaters. A design flaw meant that it could never be emptied. The urine stayed in the drum but it did ensure every phone box had the same authentic odour. However equality law meant that a female accessible squat box would be required, which was impracticable due to size, so this was the last model to possess this feature. The best example of this phone box is coincidentally the main tourist attraction of Dundee.
For more info go to
www.pointlessly-dull_nerdfacts.com That is a fascinating insight Mr Quango. I am guessing not many people share you and Giles interest in phone boxes... but I do... ahem
Blogger Blue Eyes said...
Just saying hello. I know nothing of phone boxes or Dundee so can't add any more than that. I am indeed grateful that you did not take offence. I know I have...
john.g. said...
Mutley would make a great MP, as would yourself Sir Giles! Thats very touching... I like being touched...
.
Delete
Blogger Scarlet-Blue said...
Is the phonebox listed?
Sx It is, its on the list of North oremsby tourist attractions...
I've Been Mugged said...
Surely the 'fucking telephone box' is a tourist attraction?
I'm uncertain what number twat I am. It is indeed, - but I shall soon have no readers at all. No more guest posts for nasty Giles. He is a whip thin freak
Blogger jmb said...
A telephone box. I thought they had all disappeared since 110% of the population has mobiles. Perhaps they'll become museum pieces, if any can be found undamaged by the locals. People do not have mobiles i North Oremsby.... it is delightfully untouched..
Blogger MJ said...
Did you find Mr. Mutley's calling card inside? Do you mean to suggest I poo in telephone boxes? Blimey!
Blogger Ava said...
I'm new here. Being called a double twat is quite the welcome! I guess that makes me a triple twat for still reading and wanting to follow. A triple twatted sheep. Nice. It is only Giles third post out of 378 - it will not happen again. I think you are very cute in a Rubenesque sort of way...
Blogger Daisy said...
there is town very close to where i live named Flatville...yes it is flat as the eye can see...the big attraction there is the grain elevator...things could be worse my darling...:)
It does indeed sound interesting compared to the chemical factory and the phone box, especially as I don't know what one is...
Blogger Bill Quango MP said...
Daisy.
What sort of elevator is it?
Cast iron or aluminium sheets.
Could you get a picture?
I'm feeling all flushed at the excitement. There is a rare coal powered version made of titanium and zinc as well...
Blogger Crabbers said...
The people divide themselves in two categories, those that await the telephone and those that await the tonality.
The day where the damned stupidity will sell itself in tubes, there are some that will be the first ones to offer itself a brush to teeth. Indeed Mr Crabbers, I was thinking much the same thing. Its very hot today and I have been the beach sighting! If smell then not to be whiffed at!
Daisy said...
heck i don't know bill...that seems to be all they have around here...i see them all the time but never really look at them...i will get a picture when i am out and post it just for you darling ;) I am in a fever of anticipation. Do you have any 'up skirt shots ' as well?
Blogger CherryPie said...
Well everyone else loves and appreciates me ;-) I love an appreciate you. I was going to delete this post, but I had to apologise to everyone instead... really I am sorry...:-(
nasty Giles. He is a whip thin freakTsk Tsk Mr Mutley
Poor Giles is just a tad tetchy becuase his bits rotted and dropped off
Could we have a bit of a whip-round and get Giles a brand new spanking penis?
It might cheer him up.
atleast I love me :)
Feel better Mutley!
Keshi.
Just a mo'....I can see a tower in the background, surely that's interesting?
What have you done with Mutley!?
Are you sure you haven;t been hired by the North Ormesby tourist board? I will certainly take my next holiday there!
Oooh! Dr Who is in North Oremsby! Were there aliens or supernatural forces running amok?
Well I'm the 'other' reader and having just arrived I see 39 comments already.
It must have been my alter ego commenting.
Blogger I've Been Mugged said...
Could we have a bit of a whip-round and get Giles a brand new spanking penis?
It might cheer him up. Thats a splendid idea! How very kind of you to offer to host this appeal... perhaps Blue peter might help?
Keshi said...
atleast I love me :)
Feel better Mutley!
Keshi. Thats easy for you to say as you are young and beautiful. Giles is old, ugly and of indeterminate sex...
Blogger Tickersoid said...
Just a mo'....I can see a tower in the background, surely that's interesting? It is interesting if you find late nineteenth century Anglican church architecture interesting... otherwise not.
Blogger UBERMOUTH said...
What have you done with Mutley!? Never fear Ms Uber - I am back, and horrid Giles is locked in a cupboard...
Blogger jams o donnell said...
Are you sure you haven;t been hired by the North Ormesby tourist board? I will certainly take my next holiday there! A splendid idea Mr Jams! Be sure not to forget to pack your Scrabble ....
Blogger eroswings said...
Oooh! Dr Who is in North Oremsby! Were there aliens or supernatural forces running amok? Whilst not really understanding this question - I can nevertheless confirm the complete absence aliens and the supernatural. Blimey I have enough of that at home in Somerset....
Blogger electro-kevin said...
Well I'm the 'other' reader and having just arrived I see 39 comments already.
It must have been my alter ego commenting. Hello Mr EK. How are you today? Well I trust?
It's not even a red phone box!
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